Fearsome Five: Five Staycation Books

Remember when asshole jellyfish 
were the least of our problems?

People probably had lots of vacation plans for 2020, if they started planning back in February.  And even then, many had probably held out hope that the pandemic would release its grip on the world and those vacation plans could still happen this year. We've plummeted into August and summer is flying by, but COVID-19 looks to have made itself at home in our lives and in our minds. Travel might be out of the question, but look at all the stories out there of trips outside of one's hometown, outside of their home, that go completely off the rails. Horror stories have proven time and time again that travel is overrated, maybe even dangerous.  Need proof? Here are five examples: 

Castaways by Brian Keene. When people think of vacations, some might think of sandy beaches, ocean waves, picturesque sunsets, and palm trees gently swaying in the breeze. The beach is where many people go to forget their troubles, but the people in Brian Keene’s novel discover worse issues than sunburn on their tropical island excursion. Sure, there's a reality show competition, but there are also the other inhabitants of that island who aren't exactly welcoming to tourists. 

Travelers’ Rest by Keith Lee Morris. Not interested in the beach? There's always the open road, seeing every part of this country, from beautiful mesas to majestic forests, but there's the possibility of stopping at a place that wouldn't mind you staying for a spell . . . or forever. Traveler's Rest looks like a welcome break from a long winter's drive, but for the Addison family, the hotel is actually a place where reality breaks way more than the Wi-Fi. Just like some people need working Wi-Fi, some people insist on a working reality. 

The Troop by Nick Cutter. Some people don't need a working Wi-Fi and might find themselves renewed by being away from the screens that constantly war for our meager attention spans. Return to nature, enjoy a roaring campfire, sleep under the stars. But anyone who remembers the line about nature being "red with tooth and claw" surely knows that nature isn't always relaxing. In fact, nature can often try to kill you. The stalker of the scout troop in Cutter's Lord of the Flies coated in body horror is no giant monster, but something small enough to get inside you, small enough to gnaw its way into your core. Visit these woods and you'll be hungry for more than just some time away from your iPhone.  

FantasticLand by Mike Bockoven. Maybe escaping into nature isn't your thing. Maybe you're searching for something more . . . fantastic. Time to go to a land which promises rides and games and fun galore, a place where "fun in guaranteed." But what happens when the system that makes all the rides, games, and fun run breaks down? A place full of dreams can easily turn into one full of nightmares once the power goes out and the authorities are nowhere to be seen. I mean, the teens that get trapped in FantasticLand make do by forming gangs, battling for supplies, and even getting into some recreational cannibalism. Aren't those turkey legs at Disney World great? 

Worst Laid Plans: An Anthology of Vacation Horror by Samantha Kolesnik (editor). If I missed something, it's more than likely covered in this anthology edited by the author of the disturbing debut novel True Crime. Meeting new people you wouldn't otherwise? V. Castro's story suggests that's a bad idea. Still think the beach is a great place to relax? Hailey Piper might suggest anywhere else. Want to learn more about our reptile friends? The story from Malcolm Mills shows one can know too much. The introduction to this collection is written by horror reviewer and blog celebrity Mother Horror, who I'm guessing would suggest you just stay home and read.

Fearsome Five: Five Books Coming Out in April

Hey, everyone. It's been a while. I've been hunkered down amidst the dark stacks, trying to stay safe, get some work done, and avoid any Wiki holes that will make me an expert on, say, Thundercats trivia and little else. It's the old paradox about having too much time, finding the best way to be the most productive. After stockpiling toilet paper and watching the entirety of Tiger King on Netflix, I figured it was high time to get back to talking about the genre that is near and dear to my pumping, gore-soaked heart. And what better way to reconnect (while maintaining social distancing, of course) is to look around and see five scary books that are coming out this April.
Eden by Tim Lebbon Horror with an ecological message is rare, but this entry offers up an interesting sci-fi premise. The world has gotten so polluted that humanity has literally given back to nature areas known as the Virgin Zones, which are allowed to flourish with exotic fauna and wildlife, essentially a replacement for the rainforest and other lands we've destroyed. These areas are typically untouched, until a group explores one of these zones, Eden, and discovers that what humanity gave up, nature will fiercely preserve with the weapons at its disposal.
The Wise Friend by Ramsey Campbell Fans of a more subtle brand of horror tend to gravitate toward Ramsey Campbell, and this title is sure not to disappoint. An English professor knows his beloved Aunt Thelma is a famous artist whose work had grown darker before she finally committed suicide. What he learns is that the occult and her visits to sites of magical power may have had a hand in her death. When his teenage son begins to follow in his aunt's footsteps, will the father be able to save the son? And himself?
Velocities: Stories by Kathe Koja How do you feel about short story collections? How about creepy dolls? Artists and their dark inspirations? Short story collections are like the buffets of fiction; gives you the ability to sample bite-sized examples of an artist's talent. This collection features 13 never before published stories that are all distinctly Kathe Koja, and you know you've made it when your own name becomes an adjective.
The Ancestor by Danielle Trussoni A Gothic sci-fi tale that starts out like a dream come true, until it becomes a nightmare, of course. Alberta "Bert" Monroe discovers that she's inherited a noble title, a lot of cash, and a castle in Italy, she discovers a branch of her family tree that she never knew existed. But after indulging in the sudden fortune and fame, she discovers that belonging to the Montebianco family exerts a very high price that, despite her newfound wealth, she may be unable to pay.
The Southern Book Club's Guide to Slaying Vampires by Grady Hendrix Fans of Steel Magnolias and Fright Night will love this uniquely horrific mashup that is unquestionably Grady Hendrix (see what I did there?). Patricia Campbell is a harried housewife and mother whose idea of unwinding is talking true crime with her true crime book club. When a stranger moves into her neighborhood and children turn up missing, Patricia discovers something far more sinister that what Agatha Raisin deals with.

Fearsome Five: Top Five Reimaginings of Frankenstein

On February 1st, 1851, Mary Shelley passed away but not before she cemented her legacy in the burgeoning horror genre. Frankenstein, her seminal story about monsters and the men that don't think about the consequences of creating them, lives on in everything from classic movies to cereal mascots. Its longevity is, in part, because this story, like all good horror and science fiction, hits on some timeless and timely themes, ranging from relationships with creators (parents?) to hubris disguised as the pursuit of science, has allowed this tale to come back in a myriad of forms, like its monster, pieced together from our own experiences, cultures, and folklore. On this, the anniversary of her death, to celebrate the monster she has brought to life and we keep resuscitating, here are my top five Frankenstein-inspired reading suggestions.
5) Made Men: Getting the Gang Back Together: It's a continuation of the Frankenstein mythos with a little Kill Bill and Lethal Weapon thrown into the mix. Easily one of the more original takes, this graphic novel, written by Paul Tobin of Colder fame, features Jutte, a police officer and ancestor of the infamous Doctor Frankenstein. When a bust goes wrong, she brings her team back from the dead, more or less, and back together to get revenge on the lowlifes that tried to kill them. This book features hard-boiled modern noir and a guy with a lion's head, if you're into one or the other. Or even both.
4) Monster: A Novel of Frankenstein: David Zeltserman's novel is told from the monster's perspective, and he turns out to be more sympathetic in many ways than in the original story. The monster, named Friedrich, evolves throughout the story into a hero who must stop the evil doctor Victor Frankenstein, a depraved individual and the man responsible for Friedrich's resurrection. Friedrich has his share of supernatural adventures, encountering vampires and Satanists, but still manages to keep the focus on the dichotomy between the monster at its maker. 
3) Mary Shelley Monster Hunter: Vol. 1 Abomination: Not only does this graphic novel retell the Frankenstein story but also weaves within it the story of its creator. The tale begins in a Mary Shelley museum and goes back to Mary Shelley's inspiration for the tale, a trip with her fiancee Percy Shelley as well as their companion Lord Byron. Forced out of their accommodations, the group must spend the winter in the castle of Dr. Victoria Frankenstein, where Shelley discovers her real-life attempts to create life. This feminist take, with the doctor and monster maker being a woman, doesn't skimp on the horror and suspense, and authors Adam Glass and Olivia Cuartero-Briggs create something unique while paying homage to a well-known story. It's a tightrope they seem to walk with ease.
2) Frankenstein in Baghdad: Ahmed Saadawi takes the familiar tale far from its European roots and creates a timely fantastic tale in the process. Hadi scavenges up the parts of people and stitches them together in order for the dead to be recognized by the government and given a proper burial. However, Hadi soon discovers that his creation gets a mind of its own, a mind centered on revenge and on keeping itself alive by stealing replacement parts. This story excels in showing the struggles of war-torn Iraq using the lens of the fantastic.
1) Victor LaValle's Destroyer: Another timely retelling/continuation of the Frankenstein mythos that leans into the tragedy of police shootings, the tension of contemporary race relations, and the all-too familiar narrative of lives taken too soon. Dr. Baker is a mother who loses her young son to a police shooting. Of course, as a scientist and a descendant of Dr. Frankenstein's, she has the tools to rectify this situation and seek revenge on the world that allowed this tragedy to happen. Expect lots of superscience and secret government organizations, but LaValle's work also forces us to look at what our society has become and whether or not we can do anything about it.

Fearsome Five: Five Stories with Writing Advice from Stephen King

In November, many people are preoccupied with either cooking or consuming as many calories as possible while also wondering whether they can enjoy, tolerate, or survive encounters with their family members. For many writers, especially those looking for a boost in motivation, they think of NaNoWriMo, that month where writers try to write a novel or curse themselves for being unable to write one.  Rather than simply using this month to stuff one’s face and ignore their keyboards, we should look to Stephen King, the patron saint of scary writing, for inspiration. He wrote a book called On Writing, of course, but he also has a great many stories that feature writers (he does seem to know the psychology of writers rather well). Here are five Stephen King stories that, in their own way, offer some advice about writing.

5) Bag of Bones: What is basically a ghost story done by Stephen King is also an exploration into one of the more fearsome specters that can plague writers: writer’s block. Mike Noonan is trying to process the sudden death of his wife. Retreating to a cabin in the main woods, he finds an entire town that is haunted by a vengeful spirit. That spirit haunts Mike by giving him messages from beyond the grave through fridge magnets and other unexplained phenomenon, but he also has seemingly rediscovered the ability to write. Writer’s block can derail any would-be novelist’s agenda and writers can find Mike’s experiences of trying to produce anything relatable. Mike might be dealing with a ghost but that ghost is getting help from Mike’s own failures and doubts.

4) Lisey’s Story: Writers, especially horror writers, know that it can be hard to explain to other people why you write. The pay’s not good starting out, there’s potential for all kinds of rejections (which is compounded by social media), and as Mike Noonan demonstrated, there’s plenty of personal demons looking to thwart your efforts. Lisey Landon, wife of a famous novelist and the protagonist of this book, discovers to her horror what has been inspiring her husband. When husband Scott’s life is taken away violently, Lisey must finally begin to clean out his workspace, wherein she discovers a reality Scott tapped into called Boo'ya Moon. The problem for Lisey, as she discovers more and more about this world, is that the exit signs in this world aren’t clearly marked.  Like Bag of Bones, Lisey’s Story looks not only at dealing with the loss of a loved one but it also explores trying to learn about them from what they left behind. The ultimate lesson for writers in this work might be that what’s inspiring them might be just as wild and unpredictable as Boo'ya Moon. The question writers must ask themselves is how tightly they want to hold on to the real world when the inner world is so seductive.

3) Misery: People who haven’t read the book may remember the movie featuring Kathy Bates showing a truly horrific bedside manner (Her character Annie Wilkes also uses the words Cockadoodie and Cocksucker).  But this feature looks at the very peculiar relationship between the writer and the reader. The reader interprets the writer’s view of the world as it is filtered through the written word. Paul Sheldon wrote the Misery books to make some money and hated them. To Annie Wilkes, Misery, the protagonist in these novels, lived and thrived in her imagination. This story has been read as another fan that takes their obsession too far, something that might make writers nervous about being accosted in public or, worse, in private, but it also looks at the passion and fervent belief a writer can potentially evoke in a reader, for better or worse. Sure, it’s a novel about physical and psychological torture, but a positive spin on that book is that Annie Wilkes believed in the character of Misery so much that Annie couldn’t let Misery cockadoodie die.

2) “The Ballad of the Flexible Bullet” (found here): This novella from King focuses on magazine editor Henry and his descent into madness. One day, Henry discovers a story from author Reg Thorpe and soon after Henry begins to share in Thorpe’s paranoid fantasies, including tales of the Fornits, little people that live in his typewriter, and of course the omnipresent They. Horror is full of slow descents into madness, and a few fast ones, but Ballad is a King story that shows a unique struggle creatives endure, particularly the writer: the need to create in isolation and the detrimental effects isolation can have. Writing, or any creative endeavor, often gets associated with insanity, the need to create and express beautiful and terrible truths about the human condition leading to a kind of forbidden, even corrosive, knowledge, or a gateway into Boo'ya Moon. The advice to take from this? Simply to have a break once in a while, at least to let friends and family know that your work hasn’t swallowed you whole.

1) The Shining: Yeah, it’s a book about a boy who has the Shine. There’s also a haunted hotel that wants to absorb that Shine as well as the boy and his family into its cursed menagerie of malevolence. But The Shining wouldn’t be the book it is, or the Stanley Kubrick movie it is, without the father and diabolical instrument of the hotel Jack Torrance. The man who says Here’s Johnny through a hole he himself chopped into a door is a very complex man and his descent into madness begins simply as a man trying to do right by his family. Out of a job, he becomes the caretaker of the Overlook so that he can have an income for him and his family, but he was a writer that was waiting for that masterpiece. That masterpiece Torrance chased down in the dark halls of the Overlook always eluded him, so the hotel just had to wait for Torrance’s frustration at his current situation to reach critical mass before it could use him. Jack Torrance isn’t your typical axe-wielding (or mallet-wielding in the novel) villain; he’s pushed to his breaking point when all the opportunities to improve his life, including his play, have been decimated. Simply put, to pin your hopes on one writing, no matter its perceived level of genius, is insanity. My wife actually said to just write, to not worry about making Stephen King levels of money and notoriety and just writer, create because you want to create. She’s not a writer, but it’s the best writing advice I ever got.

Fearsome Five: Top Five Books to Recommend to Fans of the Joker Movie

With so much great horror to read, I haven’t had the time to actually talk about the new Joker movie starring Joaquin Phoenix and depicting yet another origin of the Clown Prince of Crime. Purists may quibble about a superhero movie being discussed here, but if there’s any villain who embodies the horror aesthetic, it’s the Joker. Looking at the movie, I can see where they get the comparisons to Taxi Driver. The Man-Who-Would-Be Joker Arthur Fleck does seem like a modern-day Travis Bickle, Gotham is portrayed as an urban pressure cooker as real as New York, and the one percenters in charge become the figureheads of everyone’s misery. Comparisons aside, Joker is a fascinating view of one man’s descent into insanity exacerbated by the circumstances of his existence.  When everything that Arthur has believed in is revealed to be flawed or outright lies, he begins to believe that nothing matters, that existence is a joke, and that is when the Joker that has been fascinating and terrifying audiences is born.

But Joker has been around nearly as long as his nemesis, and like Batman, Joker has gone through some evolutions and depictions which have evolved him into a truly scary villain that pushes Batman to his limits. Joker will be a story that, while not canon, will sculpt the mental image people have of Joker, just as these five graphic novels have shaped the dynamic between Batman and the Joker.

5) Batman: Under the Red Hood. While the story focuses on Batman and Jason Todd, the one Robin who was killed by the Joker and was later resurrected (Comics!), it does offer some explanation as to why Batman, who already takes the law into his own gloved hands, hasn’t simply snapped the clown’s neck or done something to truly end his horrific cycle of escape, terrorize, and get recaptured. It’s when Jason Todd, who has taken up the masked identity of the Red Hood (a historic name for fans of the comics), says that Batman must kill him or the Joker, a gun to the madman’s head. Todd explains that if their positions were reversed, he would hunt down the clown and kill him, something Batman refuses to do. He even tries to rationalize it by saying that it’s not Scarecrow, or Two-Face, someone who, according to Todd, had filled graveyards. Batman, his voice full of pathos, confesses that he thinks about killing the Joker every day and in many brutal ways, but he ultimately doesn’t because he knows that going down that path, where murder is seen as a solution, means never coming back. Because that could mean becoming . . .

4) The Batman Who Laughs. This is a Batman from a dark universe, one that is identical to our Batman except he finally makes the choice and kills the Joker. The Joker is, of course, prepared (one could argue he has always been prepared), allowing Batman to be infected with a toxin that slowly turns the Dark Knight into an amalgamation of Batman and his greatest enemy, a whipsmart tactician with no moral compunctions about killing everyone who can impede his goals, which typically involve the destruction of everything. This is also not hyperbole. This guy has taken out entire universes. Yes, universes.

 It is in this collection that the Batman Who Laughs tries to not just destroy the Batman but make sure he suffers the same fate. Batman, Joker toxin changing him, must marshal his forces and use his wits and deteriorating self-control to basically defeat himself. We talk about the Batman Who Laughs killing off entire universes, but he also stems from a dark universe, once created out of others’ nightmares. This villain and the circumstances that made him, that made Batman into the villain is what Batman probably fears the most.

3) Batman: Death of the Family. Fans may have been aware of Batman and Jokers’ battles in comics for years, but this collection acknowledges that the Joker in particular is aware of that dynamic. In fact, it is his whole purpose for the heinous acts he commits on Gotham and its citizens (bringing up a salient point about how much crime Batman causes versus how much he stops, but I digress). The Joker has returned, with a renewed mission, depicted by wearing his recently removed face as a mask. He strikes out not at Batman directly, or threatens Gotham overtly. Rather, Joker turns his attention to the various Robins and other sidekicks Batman has accumulated over the years, his family. They are indeed more to Batman than cannon fodder. They are the people he trusts the most, but they are also his support system. The Joker, however, sees the Family differently. He sees the Family as holding Batman back, so he sets out to eliminate them, ultimately forcing Batman to encounter another fear that probably motivates him, his actions being ultimately futile in preventing their deaths.

What this comic also exposes is how Joker genuinely believes (as much as the Joker can believe in anything ) that he is helping Batman become better by getting rid of what he sees as dead weight. In the Joker’s eyes, it has always been he and Batman, locked in eternal conflict until one or both are dead. It is the Joker’s true purpose for being, these tangles with the Dark Knight. Everything else, in his mind, is a distraction. The Joker’s relationship with Harley Quinn is a textbook abusive relationship that the Joker never reciprocates. His true love, always was and always will be, is Batman, who gives his twisted existence meaning.

2) Batman: Damned. In this obvious sharp right turn into horror, Batman must find help to solve a mystery: who killed the Joker? To help solve this mystery, he gets help from dashing supernatural rogue archetype John Constantine, who serves as both foil and tour guide, taking the Dark Knight through a Dante’s Inferno-esque head trip that has the Batman rediscover Bruce Wayne, the man, and Batman, the symbol. His understanding of both could be shattered as clues begin to point to himself as the lead suspect perhaps finally breaking his no-killing rule.

While this is a non-canon story, taking place in a much darker DC Universe, it does reveal the dark psychology underpinning Batman and Joker’s relationship. Batman has strictly adhered to his no killing rule, no matter the emotional and physical costs to him and members of his family. And yet the Joker is always testing that boundary, always trying to push Batman to break that rule, even if it means the death of the Joker. This comic ultimately explores the Batman possibly being pushed over the edge, but also the Joker finally succeeding in what he wanted all along: dragging Batman into the muck with him.

1) Batman: The Killing Joke. The one cited by many as the ultimate Batman/Joker story. If you ever watch the DC Animated movie, just skip that completely unnecessary Batgirl storyline and get to the main event. It’s one of many Joker origin stories (this one establishing that Joker remembers his past differently from day to day with him referring to his past as “multiple choice”), and like the Joker movie, it shows a man pushed to his limits until he snaps, leading to the famous remark that all it takes to become the Joker is “one bad day.” And what a decidedly bad day it is.

The Joker movie has lent itself to controversy with some saying it’s a manifesto for how to unravel society, even providing a rationale in that society is controlled by those in the upper echelon of wealth. Some have referred to Phoenix’s acting as he delves deep into the “bad day,” actually a series of ugly truths that, once peeled away, reveal some disturbing aspects of Arthur’s life. But this movie does owe its existence to The Killing Joke, and this work has influenced the works on this list and countless others. It is one of the first works that predicts that the ultimate end of this conflict is the death of one or both. While Batman will do anything he can to avoid it, Joker will happily accept their mutual destruction.

Fearsome Five: Five Action Movie Horror Reads

Gunfights! Judo throws! Dogs! John Wick is not only what many cite as a rediscovery of Keanu Reeves (a Keanussance, if you will), but it also represents a reinvigoration of the action genre. By leaning into the video-game like gunplay and outlandishly badass characterization, the John Wick series has created a franchise that can be both a satire and a love letter to the action genre. John Wick 3: Parabellum continues the trend with a bounty on John Wick’s head, meaning those trying to collect that bounty will only collect . . . DEATH!

Some people prefer their horror quiet, with creaking doors and evil whispers, while others like their horror big and loud, a cacophony of explosions and keening screams. For those that like their horror as loud as the shootout in Scarface, here are some horror stories that aren’t afraid to crank the volume all the way up to . . . DEATH!

5) Vampire$ by John Steakley. Fans of the movie might remember James Woods famously asking a priest if he’s “getting a little mahogany,” but the book the movie was based on is a fun, hard-boiled exploration of the lives of vampire hunters for hire. These vampire hunters aren’t in the mold of Van Helsing, even Hugh Jackman’s turn as Van Helsing seems quaint compared to the hard-drinking, motorcycle-riding, Church-sanctioned vampire hunters of Steakley’s novel. Rather than go in at night, nervously clutching crucifixes, these hunters barrel into vampire nests in broad daylight when the monsters are at their most vulnerable and most combustible. Leader Jack Crow and his team are very good at their job until an ambush leaves the team’s ranks decimated. That leaves Jack, with a new team, looking for revenge and the vampires still out for blood.

4) Little Heaven by Nick Cutter: This 80’s movie in book form begins with a trio of mercenaries being hired to rescue a woman’s nephew from the religious settlement called Little Heaven. Things happen, people and not-so-much-people die, and the mercenaries go their separate ways trying to forget what they’ve seen in Little Heaven. However, what they failed to kill in Little Heaven still wants to make their lives a living hell, and these mercenaries must get back together and finish one last job. No movie of this, but I could see this easily starring a young Arnold Schwarzenegger featuring a script by Robert Rodruigez. Finally, Clive Barker comes in to do a little script doctoring, adding a few CC’s of nightmare fuel to this tale of cosmic horror and good, old-fashioned revenge.

3) Fury from the Tomb by S. A. Sidor: If this were a movie, it would be what would have happened if John Carpenter got a hold of the Indiana Jones script. If that had actually happened, Indy would never have survived a nuclear explosion in a refrigerator because he would have left the franchise screaming before Crystal Skull was even conceived. The year is 1888 and young Egyptologist Rom is the only survivor of an expedition that has uncovered a collection of mummies. One mummy in particular is of particular interest to this expedition’s benefactor, so Rom must transport his cursed cargo by train, which is then hijacked. Joining with sidekicks ranging from a dead-eyed Wild West marksman to an orphan Chinese boy, Rom encounters flesh-eating ghouls, evil monks, and hopping vampires. And then there’s what’s really in those sarcophagi.

This book is part of the Institute of Singular Antiquities series, the next book being The Beast of Nightfall Lodge.

2) The Running Man by Richard Bachman: Sure, the movie had Schwarzenegger but it also had Hunters that looked straight out of a Toys R’ Us action figure aisle. The book by Stephen King’s angrier alter ego is a much more boiled-down bit of dystopia, featuring Ben Richards, a man at the end of his financial rope who submits to be part of The Running Man series, where he is hunted while a studio audience and viewers at home are watching. The movie amps up the game show feel, particularly with Family Feud’s Richard Dawson as showrunner Killian, the host, but the book is a more pointed commentary on social inequality and how the human race is more likely to allow suffering if that suffering is entertaining. Think of the last time you watched a video of skateboarding kids wiping out on the hard concrete or people “Ghost Riding the Whip,” only to have the cars they were supposed to be driving go out of control, and you can see that the themes in this story are still all too relevant.

1) Throttle by Joe Hill and Stephen King: I discovered this homage to the novella “Duel” in He Is Legend, an anthology of stories honoring one of the pioneers of fantastic fiction Richard Matheson. Regardless of your feelings about remakes and remakes of remakes, Hill and King capture what made Matheson’s “Duel” such a classic of slow-building tension that soon feels like it’s careening downhill to an explosive conclusion. Sure, this father-and-son homage involves bikers, and there’s also a father-son dynamic between Vince, leader of the motorcycle club The Tribe, and his upstart son Race.  But what’s kept at the piston-pumping heart of this tale is the relentless semi-truck that barrels down on the bikers like an avalanche of Detroit steel and the dynamic battle of wits and of wills between Vince and the trucker, the singular mind in charge of an 18-wheeled weapon. Be on the lookout for this one in Joe Hill’s upcoming collection Full Throttle.  

Fearsome Five: Five Scary Monsters from the Scary Stories movie.

The crunch of leaves and the hint of pumpkin spice in the air signal that fall is coming.  It may bring less pleasant things like school and Ugg boots, but it also brings with it a crop of scary movies.  Seeing that I wrote about a children’s book last week that was just scary enough for adults, I’m continuing the trend by talking about the new adaptation of many a child’s gateway into horror, Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark.

Those that have seen the movie may notice the visual stylings of producer Guillermo Del Toro all over this thing, particularly with the monsters that strike from their story book. And these monsters that might have been born by a campfire or gestated in a dark imagination lead to different monsters residing in books that frequent the adult section. This is largely because they hit on some basic human terrors that show up in a lot of stories. As we discuss these stories, THERE WILL BE SPOILERS! Hopefully, you already knew that.

1) Harold the Scarecrow: The coming of fall makes beginning with our resident sinister, straw-stuffed shadow dweller particularly apropos. Scarecrows are made to scare birds, animals not always known for their intelligence, but there’s also something disquieting about the way Harold is depicted in the film. It gets particularly disturbing watching him dispatch a particularly rotten kid who went out of his way to abuse him with a baseball bat when he was just a thing stuffed with straw.

Scarecrows and the general dark side of agriculture come up again and again in folk horror, which deals with not only a dark connection to the land but traditions that can be bloody. Nosetouch Press recently came out with an anthology of folk horror called The Fiend in the Furrows and are already working on part 2. For something more clearly scarecrow-related, Norman Partridge’s Dark Harvest deals with a town’s Halloween tradition of sending out its young men to hunt a scarecrow stuffed with candy and evil magic. However, as they hunt this scarecrow, the scarecrow may be hunting them as well. The tale also has a coming-of-age message for one young man and a message for all of us about following traditions blindly.

2) The Toe: It’s a ghost that wants its toe back. What use does an angry spirit have for a decayed toe? Who cares? It’s her toe. The idea of the vengeful ghost is one that shows up in classics like Hamlet (even if the titular character is the instrument of the ghost’s revenge) as well as more modern tales like The Lovely Bones (not horror, per se, but a haunting meditation on the afterlife, particularly for a life that ended violently). The trope of spirits with unfinished business can be portrayed as a goal for a paranormal protagonist, but that unfinished business can also lead to some very angry spirits.

The Woman in Black by Susan Hill has a spirit who will not rest until her story is told. Joe Hill’s Heart-Shaped Box features a spirit sicced on an aging rocker who simply wanted a dead man’s suit for his collection. Peter Straub’s Ghost Story, though, is almost horror metafiction, looking at the ghost not just as a spirit refusing to die but as a recurring theme in our folklore, as is the short story “The Forbidden” in Clive Barker’s Books of Blood. For a real out-of-the-box entry, Thomas Olde Heuvelt’s  Hex has a very original premise about a ghost known as the Black Rock Witch, who has weaved herself into the lives of the small town she has cursed and a high-tech surveillance team makes sure the town stays quarantined. Until that quarantine is broken and then the Black Rock Witch really gets her revenge.

3) The Red Spot: The tale starts with the titular red spot that grows more and more inflamed until it becomes apparent that it is much more than a mere skin blemish. In fact, arachnophobics might want to steer clear of this story. But body horror such as this has been the subject of many stories. Clive Barker’s Cenobites from The Hellbound Heart is a more extreme example of body modification but Franz Kafka’s The Metamorphosis isn’t about someone filled with bugs as discovering that they have become a bug. Body horror can be about things living in your body, like Nick Cutter’s excellent Lord of the Flies riff called The Troop. It can also be about realizing that your own body is no longer yours.

One of the greatest cinematic examples of this, which owes a lot to Kafka, is The Fly, where Jeff Goldblum comments about “an insect who dreamed he was a man” still bring chills. Zombies will always be a big subgenre of body horror (just look at how much The Walking Dead has saturated all forms of media) and it will continue to be big as long as people fear the notion of death and what will happen once their bodies move underground and their new insectile tenants move in. Werewolves also undergo a frightening metamorphosis, but they have been mostly starring in paranormal romances featuring sparkling vampires. The Last Werewolf features a werewolf ruminating on his early days as a lycanthrope while Max Booth’s Carnivorous Lunar Activities focuses on a slightly more reluctant werewolf.

4) The Dream (The Pale Lady): The story involves a dire prediction that ends up coming true. Even as far back as Cassandra in Greek myth, ill omens are a great source of horror, particularly when the protagonist tries their best to change events only to realize that they cannot. Loss of control of one’s body is frightening, but so is a loss of control of one’s circumstances, where even if you try to change your destiny, your destiny barrels down on you like a semi-truck with its brake lines cut.

Stephen King gave us two very distinct novels that talk about fate as something to fear. The first is The Dead Zone, where a man discovers that he can see the future, but he can’t always control what he sees, and it still doesn’t do him too much good in the end. There is also The Shining. Young Danny Torrance can see the future thanks to his Shining, but that doesn’t mean he can change it. It doesn’t help that he is only five years old, and his parents see his visions as a neurological issue, or a curiosity, or the desires of a frightened boy to leave the very haunted hotel that they’ve found themselves stranded in for the winter. Danny being too young to be listened to, to take any action that could save him or his family, is what makes the fact that Redrum is coming all the more frightening.

5) The Jangly Man (original creation inspired by different stories): The Jangly Man’s refrain of “Me Tie Dough-ty Walker” links it to the eponymous story found in the collection and Del Toro has admitted to being inspired by “Aaron Kelly’s Bones,” a story about a dancing corpse, for its design. It’s also safe to say that Del Toro’s own work inspired it, particularly his penchant for using things that appear human but move in unsettling, inhuman ways.

Look through the man’s film catalog, from the Pale Man in Pan’s Labyrinth to the ghosts in Crimson Peak, and you’ll see beings whose proportions lend them a truly alien quality. This is in part to some genius hiring, such as Doug Jones, famous for bringing characters like Abe Sapien to life on the big screen, and Javier Botet. Diagnosed with Marfan Syndrome, a genetic condition that gives Botet long, fine fingers as well as a uniquely tall, thin body shape, he has played his share of aliens and ghosts. Jangly Man, however, is played by newcomer and contortionist Troy James, who makes the movements of the Jangly Man, as well as Baba Yaga in the new Hellboy remake, unnerving to see.

Though this is particularly disturbing visually, literature has made use of this as well. Those who watched IT: Chapter One no doubt remember Pennywise the Dancing Clown, emerging from an old refrigerator, his body and limbs unwinding, complete with the popping of joints being snapped back into place, until he stands at his full clown height and there are many instances in the book where he “flows” into sewers and drains. D. W. Gillespie’s The Toy Thief also has a very elongated body structure which it uses to sneak around and steal much more than toys. Another trait that these monsters share is their proclivity to darkness, whether it’s closets, sewers, or chimneys. And let’s not forget the darkest place they hang out: the human imagination. The seeds of these terrors were already planted by Scary Stories and those stories like them.